Some Thoughts on Jesus (of all things)

I don't know if you could call me a Christian. Although I accepted Christ as my savior in elementary school, had a father as a minister and attended church faithfully for many years, today I enjoy such activities as drinking cocktails, smoking a pipe, and spending Sunday mornings on the beach. It's not that I hate church--although I've come close to it a few times. Even after watching self-absorbed hypocrites throw metaphorical rocks at my dad (simply because he preached the truth), watching my home congregation split over radical ideologies, and hearing the same backward doctrines touted at countless churches, I still occasionally wish to find solace in spiritual disciplines.

I guess my main problem is...I hate church. Or really, I hate the way some ministers (and even non-Christians) talk about Jesus. To hear their description of Him, one would think that if He walked among us today, He'd be standing on a Los Angeles street corner handing out teddy bears to environmentalists and homosexuals (not that there is anything wrong with either of those groups). It's just that people have associated Jesus with love and forgiveness for so long that they've turned him into...pardon my French...a pussy.

The Jesus I read about in scripture is anything but. He called the church leaders of his day "hypocrites"...to their faces. He called a Samaritan woman--who sought healing from Him--a "dog." He braided His own whip and single-handedly drove merchants out of a temple for selling sacrificial animals inside. He accused the only disciple who believed He was the messiah as having "little faith"--after walking on water to come to Him, no less! He even told His disciples in Luke 12: "Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division." Jesus was indeed compassionate toward those who could not help themselves, but to believers, the dishonest and the apathetic, He was a force that none could reckon with. Hardcore. A true revolutionary.

This is the Jesus I love, but whom so many seem to have forgotten. If He were here today, I have no doubt that He'd be healing sick children on the streets, but I believe He would also be traveling from country to country, church to church, saying much about our warped perceptions and lack of faith. I'm sure Jesus would have some rather cutting remarks for me as well. But oh, at least then I wouldn't have to wonder about the state of my soul.