Connections

August 11, 2010

I don't know what's going on with my marriage.

I feel like I'm having a tough time connecting with my husband. We cuddle, we kiss, we say "I love you"--we talk about our days and what is happening with our son--but there seems to be an awkward silence between us.

We used to have so much in common. We could talk for hours about books, politics, our dreams and goals.... Now my husband could care less about politics. We stopped reading the same books well over a year ago. And we've rehashed our dreams and goals so much that discussing them yet again sometimes feels like a stab in the eye.

I sort of snapped at my husband a few days ago. He asked if I was ok for about the sixth time that day. I said yes. But the truth is, I don't really know.

My soul is empty but my mind is full. I have tons of mental energy and nowhere to put it, yet I move around the house as if I'm stuck in a bog. The simplest tasks seem to take forever to complete. I'm slow at everything these days. And it makes me crazy.

I want to talk to my husband, but what do I say? We've acknowledged before that we aren't quite on the same page like we were before marriage. So what is there to say? "Be present in mind as well as body?" Because it seems he's out to lunch as well.

4 comments:

Butterfly said...

I often feel the same way... I totally hear where you're coming from. ((HUGS))

April said...

Thanks. That means a lot.

Caramel Cutie said...

I'm not married but I had been in a situation similar to yours. I know how it is when your not on the same page anymore but you will have to sit down one day and re-evaluate your relationship. For me it was hard but it was something that needed to be done. Best Wishes.

Vicki said...

sometimes marriages have ups and downs. actually, i think all marriages have ups and downs. you both just have to stay committed to staying married, and working through issues together. i used to be scared to tell my husband what was bothering me, and what was inside of my head. but, i remembered that he is my best friend in this life, and if i cant tell him, then who can i tell? it is better for me to write him emails too, since i am not much of a talker, and i can write it out better.

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